A missed miscarriage is a loss that happens without your body knowing it. It's sometimes called a silent miscarriage. There are no outward signs like bleeding or cramping, which often accompany other types of miscarriage. Instead, the discovery usually happens during a routine ultrasound, when the absence of a heartbeat or the lack of fetal development is noted.

What to expect physically?

Physically, the experience of a missed miscarriage can unfold in several ways. Once discovered, you typically have three options: expectant management, medication, or a surgical procedure. Each path carries its own set of physical sensations and timelines.

What to expect emotionally?

Emotionally, a missed miscarriage can feel like a cruel trick. The initial shock of the diagnosis can be deep. You may have been envisioning a future with your baby, and suddenly that future is gone, often without any warning. This can lead to feelings of disbelief, anger, and deep sadness.

One of the most gentle things you can do for yourself is to allow space for all your feelings. There is no need to rush through the grief or to try to "be strong" for others. Let the sadness, the anger, the confusion, and the emptiness wash over you when they come. These feelings are a natural part of processing loss.

What other people get wrong?

When you experience a missed miscarriage, others often struggle to understand the unique complexities of your loss. One common misconception is the idea that because there were no outward signs of pregnancy loss, the grief must be less deep. They might say things like, "At least you didn't have to go through all the physical pain," or "It's better this way, before you got too attached." These statements diminish your experience and invalidate your grief.

How to tell people about missed miscarriage

You have just learned that your baby no longer has a heartbeat, or perhaps that they never developed one at all, and your body has not yet recognized this …